#i digress i love the four of them so much
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omg happy pride month
#the fruity four have finally been drawn together#this actually killed me omg#four characters and a background what was i thinking (i wasnt)#anywho sorry for disappearing for like several months thats on me#my brain has been absolutely rotting since my tv broke (i cant play on my ps4😔😔) and i got back into Fortnite as a result#i digress i love the four of them so much#i have like relatively solid redesigns for all of them exept brick cause his is already great#but i wanted to change his build cause he looks stupis asf in game💀💀💀#ALSO im working on a rewrite of bl1 so that is something to look forward too#borderlands#borderlands 2#borderlands 3#lilith the firehawk#roland the soldier#brick the berserker#mordecai the hunter#owl.archives
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I decided to start talking about Wick and Rocky's relationship because I like their dynamics too, I like seeing Wick scared of Rocky and Rocky being aggressive with him, which is unusual because Rocky is rarely aggressive with anyone, but of course Wick is an exception to rule
Also my mini opinion about their possible relationship, I think that if Rocky didn't have to fight for his place, then he and Wick could become friends, or at least tolerate each other a little, I also see some superficial similarities, their gentlemanly and romantic natures, and their common love for explosions (remembering the quarrymen chapter), but this is my assumption, I think that I don't understand the characters' personalities well, so I can be wrong in this assumption, something like that. So, what do you think about their relationship?
for starters, i cannot thank you enough for this ask! as i’ve said previously, i have many thoughts on these two, so it’s nice to finally be able to share some of them. although given the extent to which i think about them, i apologize in advance if this is sloppy and sort of everywhere … while i’ll try to structure things the best i can, i cannot promise i’ll succeed! but hopefully this is an enjoyable reply nonetheless.
one of my favorite things about rocky and wick’s relationship is absolutely how aggressive rocky is towards the aristocrat ; he is prone to glares and cruel jokes and borderline hissing whenever the man is within his line of sight, or can be brought to a wailing-fit over the mere mention of his name from miss m’s mouth. there is a childishness to it, but a very prominent threat as well in spite of rocky’s usual incompetence. so he goes out of his way to posture around wick, readily lying and adorning himself with the gangster drapes he so badly wants to wear, in the hopes that it intimidates … will even badmouth wick’s family and make fun of his name and rock related obsession to mitzi, and so on so forth! yet all of this is very reminiscent of schoolyard bullying rather than anything too severe, though we as the audience understand rather quickly that rocky would bash wick’s head in with a tire iron if he could. ( translation : if it wouldn’t earn the tears or hate of a certain beloved mitzi may ) and it’s all very intense despite the absence of actual violence! and i understand why many fans see this as unusual for rocky and believe that it’s only wick who makes him act so aggressively, but i’d argue it isn’t really wick at all that prompts such scary reactions from him … and that rocky is a deeply angry character who’s a.) been boiling quietly for a long, long time and b.) has turned wick into a punching bag of sorts for this inner world of resentment and hurt. basically, when he’s judging the well-to-do or poking fun, his eyes don’t look at wick and actually acknowledge him as sedgewick sable ; instead this is a being, something vague and metaphorical, who threatens to upseat rocky’s permanence in the lackadaisy and steal away his savior, and he’s had a hand in the violinist’s misfortune for a long time.
obviously, rocky doesn’t think wick robbed him of his family twice over and made him homeless, but he is channeling the fear and anguish of those events into his loathing for wick, if that makes sense? it’s easier that way -- to finally have an outlet for everything bleeding inside of you, to be able to bite and claw at something without feeling conflicted or having to take personal accountability for your own mistakes … which is something that i think rocky does struggle with to a degree. he is sort of a finger pointer! his pain has to be worth something, it has to be for someone else ; spending years homeless and losing his last bit of family was for freckle, and the scrambling of his literal brain was for mitzi, and that means he can’t ever be angry with them! well, except that he is, somewhat, but he buries it deep down instead of feeling it. with freckle there is a sense of strain between them -- an air of ‘you owe me’ from rocky to freckle as he uses freckle to appease miss m, and he constantly pokes fun at his cousin too. it’s lighter than his jabs at wick, but there’s a constant pestering, a reminder of how good freckle has it : how he’s got the mom and the house and the job and the girl most notably. i don’t think rocky is intending to come across as mean, and to his credit he hardly does! but it’s rather clear to me that some part of him, some hidden and deeply hurt part, is rather indignant about taking the fall for freckle all those years ago. which he can’t understand, because how could he? he made that choice, he decided to take accountability for something he didn’t do because he loves freckle and knows it’d be so easy to believe this family tragedy was roark’s fault ; the devilish child he was, all troublesome and too broken to properly fit anywhere. so there is a disconnect born here, where rocky can’t comprehend that he’d be angry at freckle, so instead these not so great feelings are placed elsewhere and silently boil over time. and with mitzi … i don’t think he’s angry at her per se, but there is a frustrated and desperate chorus of : why him and why not me, when i’m the one out here dying for you? which is certainly unpleasant. of course, rather than allowing those feelings to be more aimed at miss m, whom he feels unloved by, he ( again! ) represses these emotions and allows them to fester into his greatest fears and fantastical complexes. i think there is a lot of other miscellaneous anger he could have towards others too … perhaps some part of him is sore upon seeing ivy’s normal lifestyle, watching her go to university and knowing that’s been taken from him. or an ache felt when hearing stories from zib and the band and how they used to travel successfully, living as nomads, and rocky is all too reminded of his similar lifestyle and how he couldn’t make it work as effortlessly. people with immense trauma are more prone to irrational anger and jealousy, to viewing everything around them as unfair and believing it’s even more unjust that so many people get to live comfortably while they’ve suffered. a situation that gets more messy when you’re someone like rocky, a man who’s willingly made choices that have harmed himself and wants to continue on with his smiling, bumbling fool of an act. he does not want to be angry, does not want to see it within himself, i think, which leads to an accidental increase of it.
all of this is to reiterate that wick is a scapegoat for rocky and nothing more. it’s why he’s rather hypocritical whenever it concerns the man. for example, it was stated by tracy that he looks down upon wick for his excessive presence at the bar, yet he appears to enjoy hanging out with zib -- who drinks just as often! he makes fun of how all wick ever talks about is rocks, when he himself is prone to poetry rambles that people find irritating or boring, and etc etc. this is also just a human nature thing, to critique someone you heavily dislike and even going as far as to belittle things you love or do in your own day to day because you just hate them that bad! but given rocky’s willingness to befriend anyone, it more so reeks of a dehumanization element. wick is every obstacle in his way, every divine force that threatens to send him packing again, so he is equal parts unnerved by wick’s presence and angry about it. it is mostly a fear response we are seeing, an emotion that’s morphed into long held resentment and anger. so his actions are extremely defensive, with him trying to push wick far away and keep him and mitzi separate, like some sort of animal attempting to ward off a threat that’s come too close to their home. despite the loaded animosity there, this hate has hardly reached its peak … but it shall only grow more intense as things continue onward i’m afraid, since as it stands ( in the comic at least ) rocky is at an all time low … and is ten times more desperate. i’d honestly say wick has become so warped in his mind’s eye that he can only strive towards ‘winning’ over the other man, because that’s all he can see anymore. i think mitzi implying that wick willingly helped her out, the intense head injury, and rocky’s fragile emotional state is exactly what pushes him towards premeditated murder in look-see. i don’t know how people perceive that arc, but to me it’s very clear that rocky actively sought to see the deaths of wes and fish that night. going as far as to lament that he’d be, “very disappointed if ( he ) dreamed them,” and purposefully luring the marigold duo away to have freckle pick them off. while you could argue that this was a smart move, in a gangster sort of sense, there’s still no denying that rocky is oddly chipper about the whole thing and is now seeking death out ; whereas before his methods of vengeance were just, well, ruining people’s livelihood but ultimately leaving them alive. this isn’t to discredit the fact that rocky is going through something! he is in a very muddled and dark place, mentally and physically, but even tracy has said that the head injury hasn’t changed rocky’s personality -- it’s only brought things to the surface.
source : q&a with tracy .
which, yeah! makes sense! head trauma can cause a person to become a wreck emotionally ( think mood swings, irritability, etc ) but it doesn’t completely morph someone either. personality changes may occur, but it’s not like you’re being rewritten entirely, you know? and given tracy’s old statement, it’s clear that ‘personality changes’ aren’t a side effect he’s suffering from. something that adds to my beginning statement, which is that rocky is a deeply angry and troubled person, more so than fans give him any credit for.
however, to touch upon your mini opinion about these two, i actually wholeheartedly agree that rocky and wick could become friends if circumstances were different. they do in fact have many superficial similarities, but one of the more prominent things they deeply share is never really belonging in the groups they frequent. this is more overt with rocky’s character, yet wick faces it too in subtle ways. the well-to-do crowd, seen through the investors, find the gentleman to be lacking in about every place imaginable ; to them he is an obsessive freak who cares too deeply for meager rocks, something they constantly mock him for, while he’s also being noticeably set apart from the rest of them … he seems younger than the investors, more excitable, passionate, and a little less experienced, and doesn’t seem to care for money or reputation as much as them either. there is a constant rubbing between him and them, where what he enjoys is seen as wrong, such as his love for the lackadaisy and his choice in paramor, a grieving widow with extremely dangerous ties. we also know that wick doesn’t have many friends at all, with the only two he has being lacy and church ( church is listed as such on his character profile, in a sort of tongue-in-cheek way ), both of whom work for or with him. they are obliged to hang around, and while they care in varying ways, they are prone to judging him just as much. honestly, it’s not shocking that wick seeks refuge at his chosen speakeasy! but even there he is rather distant from everyone else. he doesn’t speak to zib ever in the comics, nor seems all too close with viktor, ivy, or horatio … it is merely mitzi he is close to, even if he knows of the other people who work there. and, once again, wick very obviously doesn’t fit in. he is not gangster material, could never be an atlas may replacement, much less someone who could get his paws dirty in such an active way. so he has his feet in two different worlds and doesn’t know how to fit into either of them, or which one he actually wants to fit into more. i think in many ways rocky could relate -- these are two very lonely people who wish to belong somewhere and be accepted by some group or another but go about it in all the wrong ways. wick, who is too hesitant to fully commit to what he wants and is worse off for it, and then rocky, who obsessively throws himself against what he wants until he breaks every bone in his body. they also have explosives to bond over, lol, and other miscellaneous things like their taste in women i suppose … but this potential bond adds to the tragedy of lackadaisy, where we see two people who on every level should get along but we’re burdened with the knowledge that it’s an impossibility anyway, because there’s no removing the circumstance of which they’re in.
though i like to believe that despite wick’s fear of rocky, he maintains a kindness towards him regardless. i think his worries about rocky are rather surface level … he doesn’t know the boy at all, really, and thus can’t make heads or tails of him, hence him believing the lie in balderdash. so when i’m feeling particularly self indulgent, i like imagining a world where they’re forced together and sort of ‘stuck’ together ; to which rocky finally breaks and exposes his wounds to wick, in every sense of the word, and wick finally gets him. the aggression, the possessiveness of mitzi … it is all fear and desperation and a profound sadness, things he’d sympathize with. if rocky was able to explain that he loathes wick because if he saves the lackadaisy then mitzi won’t need him anymore and that it’s not fair that wick gets to so easily fix things when rocky would give his soul for his home, for her, and how wick could render every sacrifice he’s already made for naught by smoothing things over with some greenbacks and he can’t lose this, he just can’t --! … which, well, wick is too kind of a man to be able to do anything except feel awful, even though it’s not his fault at all. here we have two people who could coexist! and they should, since rocky logically can’t do every speakeasy job ( band member, rumrunner, mitzi’s shadow, also the guy who gets the money for the hooch ) by himself, just like how wick can’t save the lackadaisy with only his cash and limited booze stash. it’d be a joint cooperation, a collaboration between them, both equally important in the grand scheme of crime’s every turning wheel … but rocky’s rage and fear won’t let him see that, and likely never will. still, in scenarios where everything ends up alright for the lackadaisy and the people involved in it ( which is not how canon will go, by the way ), i fancy wick and rocky getting better within their relationship. rocky will always be prickly and quick to upset around the other man sadly, but perhaps he could see wick in a softer kind of light. or at least understand vaguely enough that he isn’t out to get rocky, so to speak. and then maybe wick learns that pancakes soothe rocky’s ire and poorly makes them anytime he wishes to talk to the man, and other fun things like that! but you should have more confidence in your character analysis skills, because you were spot on ( at least in my eyes ) about them potentially getting along if things were different. it’s certainly a fun aspect to play around with, and is important to note when discussing their relationship so you can fully understand just how warped rocky’s perspective on things are. and how unstable and traumatized he is too, of course </3 sidenote, but i also hope that throughout everything i’ve said here, or anything i’ve said before on my blog, that my love for rocky and my own sympathy for him comes across well enough. while he’s deeply flawed and i have no qualms discussing said flaws in depth, i also don’t think of him as some insane freak who’s evil at his core or anything like that. honestly, i adore analyzing him so much as a character because of how far down his issues go! he’s very well written, i’ll say, as is wick and many of the other characters, but i digress.
once more, thank you for the ask! i’ll end this here because i fear if i don’t i’ll start going in circles, since their relationship is so vast and very important for rocky in a character sense. hopefully i shed some more light on it though! i love these two to bits and pieces and i wouldn’t be half as invested in lackadaisy if their dynamic wasn’t so monumental -- at least to me.
#my asks.#lackadaisy analysis.#lackadaisy#rocky rickaby#sedgewick sable#tracy j butler#i also think rocky’s sudden taste for marigold blood is him making marigold his other scapegoat#he isn’t dealing with anything in a healthy manner and is so traumatized it’s starting to spill out of him … which is. uh. not good!!#but it sure is what’s currently happening regardless#cannot stress enough that rock is a very ill and traumatized individual who hasn’t had a single break in his life#he is constantly in stressful situations that are dangerous … and like.#when you’re constantly put in those situations you become numb. and angry. and it becomes hard to heal#or to truly connect to others … etc#i could talk in depth about rocky’s traumas and why they’ve caused this anger issue and this inner disharmony inside#because frankly there’s a lot there! and i hate to say it but people who are hurt normally show their hurt in ugly ways#especially if mentally ill … which rocky is imo#it’s just the reality of things! this isn’t me demonizing mental illness or the effects of trauma. i’m just being realistic here#someone as deeply troubled as rocky ( someone with NO outlet and whom hides his feelings from others and himself )#is bound to be. well. troubled!! his smiling facade is merely another mask he wears to cope and to be good for the people he loves#it is not … really rocky rickaby … rocky rickaby is that and the wrath and the self destruction and more#AHEM but i digress. how rocky treats wick and all that has really done wonders for understanding his character#and i truly love the wick / rocky / mitzi trio so bad. their relationships with each other is what drew me into this world#like. i am shaking them so much. the overlap!! the complexities inherit in their bonds and what that says about the individual characters!#it’s amazing truly lol like … i have had such fun thinking about them twenty four seven for the past three-ish months#anyway. anyway! i love analyzing these bitches. they can fit so much into them#and i’m rooting for wickmitzi endgame and for wick to desperately try to bond with rocky … while his bloodshot eye is twitching as we speak#lots of fun!!! lots of pain and agony too … rocky is nothing but a painful character alas. that is his nature. but that is also his appeal#and ooops i’ll shut up in the tags now i just. have a lot to say. and a lotta love to give to these two!! but uh. yeah <3 loved writing thi
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Really random, but sometimes I get hardcore sucked back into the Royal Scandal series. The vibes and the stories are just A+, and so many muses get so noisy.
The only issue with that is the muses being really noisy doesn't lend itself very well to headcanons and stuff, so I'm sitting here trying to answer these Corruption questions for Creation, and the muses are in the back of my head. Doing concerning things. Being generally distracting.
Edit: Just realized that link only includes the main episode songs in their release order...which isn't the chronological order for the series. It's on the same channel if anyone wants to see the rest of the songs!
#[what is she getting us into now? -ooc-]#There's one piece of lore in the series about four kingdoms and one artifact per kingdom#each one grants something but...from what the lore suggests so far takes away something via a curse if they're misused?#or that the curses only happened when the original owners of the artifacts misused them?#but anyway#one grants power but takes away love#one grants love but takes away happiness#one grants happiness but takes away riches#and the last one grants riches but takes away power#and that's one part that my mind likes to latch onto like a squeak toy idk#I've always sort of wanted to do something to that effect with the original 4 species in Brinnela#or with the 4 realms that came after#those being Pirodet Irekol Sumydah and Wilacri or Celaeon; me and Kei have been going back and forth on which of the last two is older#It would probably be the second group tbh because they already all sort of have one that they would fit into#I DIGRESS#this post was just supposed to be to say that I'm heavily distracted and don't know how much I'm gonna get done tonight#and look at it now#a wholeass rabbit hole was gone down
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Okay okay okay everyone be cool.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! IT’S SANJI’S TURN!!! I think my bias really shines through by the fact that there are four illustrations rather than my usual three. Not to mention… this isn’t even half of the busts that I’ve drawn and also none of these are post-timeskip. I need to make a whoooole other character sheet for post-timeskip Sanji. She changes a lot in two years.
But I digress, here are my design notes for Sanji: (WARNING includes discussion of Sanji’s journey during the timeskip. There are also some super duper minor vague spoilers for whole cake island but those are written in blue so you can skip over them easily.)
So personality wise, I wanted to keep a lot of her complex relationship with femininity and gender. She grew up under the care of super butch Zeff who taught her that being a girl doesn’t mean that you have to be girly; in fact, it’s probably best if you toughen up so you can protect people who need it. Sanji takes this to heart and becomes a total tomboy, she believes that she’s rejected her feminine side completely.
She’s also a diehard romantic!! She’s the dashing prince who has come to save every damsel she comes across. She finds it very easy to flirt with women because it was very much the modus operandi on the Baratie, but she’s all talk. She gets flustered very easily once any romantic endeavor starts to bear fruit. She’ll make some poignant revelations about why once she lives in the Kamabakka Kingdom.
So why isn’t she wearing a suit? Because I’m a whore for an apron. It’s the perfect way to establish the silhouette of a dress but maintain a clean, utilitarian appearance. Fem!Sanji is more line-cook than waitress, but she DOES wear menswear pieces. I’ve put her in a silk vest with flared slacks in one outfit and she’s sporting that cute tie from Long Ring Long Land in another. Very preppy. I think she mostly wears tidier versions of Sanji’s more casual outfits: patterned button ups, cargo shorts, tees. She is religious about keeping her nails clean and manicured though. As fussy as canon Sanji is about his suits? Fem!Sanji is tenfold more fussy about her nails. She never wears polish (it could chip into the food) but her digits are trimmed perfectly and buffed to a shine.✨
She has a birthmark(?) at the nape of her neck that isn’t a scar but doesn’t tan. No one’s ever noticed it before because she was pretty good about staying inside when she lived on the Baratie but, now that she’s out adventuring on a much smaller ship, she finds herself basking in the sun more often and the mark is becoming more defined. She would be mortified to know it was there, especially since it doesn’t show up on the four other people who have similar marks because their skin cells are invulnerable to UV. (Inspired by @themetalhiro )
I love Sanji so so so so so so much. This design is like… 50% what I wish I looked like, 49% what I think is hot, and 1% forced-feminized transponder snail. I’ll have so much more to say about her characterization when I post the next version. Let me know your thoughts in the replies!!
#girl piece#fem sanji#black leg sanji#one piece#one piece fanart#op fanart#genderbend#digital art#whole cake island#one piece timeskip#post marineford#skypiea#little garden#she’s so hot it’s stupid#girl piece original design
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I’m in my Colin feels again (I mean I always am but this time it’s too much and I must get it out) so buckle up, grab some tea and biscuits, and maybe some tissues depending on if I can get this written correctly.
I know people wish Colin would have suffered more before Pen forgave him but this man was suffering long before we saw him on screen flirting with the debutants on the street. Colin spent the whole of his four month tour missing Penelope and then kept missing her up until their reconciliation. In his own words he spent his whole tour yearning to receive word from home, from Penelope, in fact. We all know he missed her more than he let on initially and baby boy was desperate to hear from her. He surely cannot think of a logical reason for her silence. Their last (known to him) exchange was shared affirmations during their romantic platonic dance. I wish we would have gotten some sort of screen time of him whilst on his travels to get a little more depth of his spiraling from the loss of her letters that leads to his fake persona but I digress. He comes home and tries to get back on track with her only to receive many a cold shoulder from Pen, first at the garden party, and then at Lady Danbury’s ball where he finally learns of the reason for her silence. He is desperate to get back in her good graces and wasted no time with his apology (the next morning, he obviously couldn’t sleep).
He then finds a way to make up for his callous remark (we’ve all read the words enough and frankly I do not wish to repeat them) in the form of helping Pen find a husband.
Only, this doesn’t help with his missing her. They get to spend more time flirting laughing together like they used to. But there is also the ticking clock running down the time they will have together. Yes, he is dumb when it comes to Penelope, but not too dim witted to not realize that as soon as she is married, things will not be the same as it had been in the past. We see him start to realize this more at the Full Moon Ball. As soon as she starts interacting with Lord Basilio and Remington, yes he gets jealous, but there’s more to it. He’s getting a glimpse of how things will be when he’s not the one she gossips with or spends time with. He’s missing her before she is even wed.
And then the kiss happens.
And she gives him up while he realizes what he has truly been missing and why he missed her so deeply when she didn’t respond to his letters and he will continue to miss her because she is looking for a husband that is not him.
Then we have proper yearning while he watches her with Debling and it is eating him alive. He is trying to accept letting her go and he becomes a shell of a man in the process. He needs his Pen. Thankfully, Mama Bridgerton talked him out of his stupor and prompted him to act.
He professes his feelings for Pen and admits that he prefers sleep because that is where he might find her. He has been following her request for distance (kind of, sort of, maybe) since the willow tree. He follows her around like the golden retriever boy he is because he will take any interaction possible, even if he has to hear her talk about how Debling is not displeasing to look at. He misses her so entirely that he will take any form of Pen he can get. Even the non tangible, dream version of her. Because up until he crashed Debling’s proposal, he thought that was going to be the future extent of Pen he would have. But now he has told her how he feels and she wants to be so much more than friends.
He thinks he doesn’t have to miss her anymore. She’s going to be his wife.
But things still aren’t right between them. Colin is the king of reading Pen (well most of the time, boy still doesn’t realize she loves him). She’s high strung and not as open as he is used to her being. He is still missing her.
He finds out the reason is Whistledown and suddenly he’s missing the idea of her he had in his head. He thinks he doesn’t know her and he is also worried about the possibility of losing her if she is found out. Again, missing her before she is gone. She gives him an out from marrying her which he, rather harshly, puts down. He is upset, rightly so, but he cannot imagine not being with her. He knows what life is like without her in it and he cannot, will not, does not want to let that happen again.
We then have the fight outside the modiste and he is able to somewhat reconcile the two women he thought were separate. The wedding happens and for a moment, they are together, and nothing else matters.
But the moment is ruined when the Queen crashes their dance, and now the very real fear for her safety is again taking precedence.
He separates himself from her physically and a bit emotionally yet he still misses her. Colin could have slept anywhere in their apartment but chose the very uncomfortable settee right outside their room so he could be close. It is just as hard on him to not be near or with her as is it for Pen to not be with him. He is yearning for her but WD is still looming over them.
Then there is Cressida. Another thing that can take Penelope away from him. We finally see him admit how much he longed to hear from Penelope. The “I miss you” from the Four Seasons Ball was over shadowed by his rake fake persona and I fear it hasn’t been taken seriously enough. He did miss her, he wasn’t just saying it to get into her good graces.
I think when he tells Cressida he longed to hear from Penelope, he remembers why she didn’t respond. It is because he hurt her. This is another step in moving forward through the WD issue. He understands they have both unfortunately hurt each other. I think this makes it easier for him to forgive her (along with the argument outside the modiste) for the hurt she has caused him.
He then royally screws up appealing to Cressida. It breaks my heart watching our teary eyed boy admit his failure but Pen is not angry with him. She sees him trying and loves him all the more for it. He’s starting to see her in her entirety, starting to understand her reasons for WD. They are so close in this moment but still are not quite where they need to be.
We see more yearning in the blanket for the settee scene from both Colin and Penelope. They miss each other, the easiness of their friendship and now the future of their marriage.
He reads her letters again, because he misses her. Not hearing from her was the catalyst in his rapid down badism and is now key in realizing that the Pen he grew up with and the Pen he now knows are both capable of being witty, sharp, and sometimes harsh He starts to miss her a little less. He now sees he has always known her and no longer feels that loss.
Penelope plans to reveal herself and they are one step closer to not missing eachother.
The next time (that we know of) they see each other is at the Butterfly Ball. The worry he feels for her while being put in the spotlight is palpable. Everything can go up in flames at any moment and he could lose her forever. If he thought he missed her before, it is nothing compared to the possibility of never having her again.
But this doesn’t happen. The look of fear is replaced by that of utter pride, love, and adoration of his best friend as he watches her triumphantly declare herself as WD. Now all of the pieces are in place. Whistledown is out in the open, he has reconciled Pen and WD, and has admitted to his envy. They can now be emotionally, physically, and mentally together. He no longer has to miss her.
Colin “my wife” Bridgerton never wants to miss his Pen again because he has spent entirely too long missing her. I cannot WAIT to see them in their happy, wedded, mom and dad bliss next season. They will be insufferable to the entire ton.
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If you’ve made it through my ramblings, I sincerely thank you. I hope it’s coherent enough and makes sense. Colin is such a complicated character and I love analyzing the way Luke plays him. All the nuances Luke slips in there truly make me love Colin even more.
#colin bridgerton#colin my wife bridgerton#Colin misses his wife#Polin#Polin ramble#bridgerton#bridgerton season 3#penelope featherington#penelope bridgerton#sorry this is so long#I’m just so passionate about my boy
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Speaking from a non-romantic point of view, it's interesting to think about the importance Sakura and Naruto had to Sasuke's decision to leave the village.
It all started with Orochimaru, right? He wanted to show Sasuke how weak he was and how much more power he needed. So what did Orochimaru do? He attacked Team 7. That's the first nail on Sasuke's coffin, because while Naruto fought the giant snake and went all against Orochimaru, well, Sasuke was scared. He had made fun of Naruto before for being scared in front of an enemy and it was Naruto's turn to throw the words back at him. It was waaaay worse when Sakura reinforced that insult by telling him that Naruto was many things, but at least he was not a coward.
He fainted due the pain of getting a cursed mark and when he woke up, he realized that Sakura had almost died defending them. Sasuke always had a protective side of him with his teammates, which was evident on the Land of the Waves arc. That's why he raged and accidentally activated the curse mark when he saw that.
While it's true that Orochimaru sent the Sound ninjas just for that purpose, he was able to keep the curse mark at bay during the preliminary fight rounds on the Chunning Exams.
So really, Sasuke became insecure not only after Orochimaru's words, but mostly after Team 7 (his own team) told him he was being too weak.
Fans also forget that he gave it a shot and tried to train with Kakashi to become stronger. That was of the final round of the Chunning Exams, when he went against Gaara. You know what cemented his insecurities even further? The fact that Sakura almost got killed over defending him again, that he had to use the curse mark for more strength because his training with Kakashi wasn't enough and that even then, Naruto had to save them.
That made the resentment grow.
Even then, the detonator was Itachi (as always). To hear Itachi was going after Naruto and that he had no interest in him because Itachi considered him weak... Fatal blow.
When the Sound Four went to propose to Sasuke to leave the village, Sasuke spent the night at that tree, thinking about Naruto and Sakura. He loved them enough for it to be a problem. Enough for it to threaten his resolution to do anything for his revenge mission against Itachi. He was willing to die against Gaara to protect them, which means his dream would be over.
That's why Sasuke left. Because he realized that it was either his devotion to his team or his devotion to his revenge. He wasn't finding the right power on Konoha, not for either of those goals... So he left to achieve at least one and decided to kill the other to stop it from being in his way.
And yet, he couldn't kill Sakura and couldn't kill Naruto. He had the chances to do both things and he did none. It'd take him years for him to try and a lot of madness for him to almost succeed, but in the end their devotion to him saved him from it.
Because after he killed Itachi without knowing the truth, killing his teammates sounds like complete hell. It would mean he lost everyone again, now by his own hand. It'd be a nightmare for the Sasuke he used to be, the kid who swore to protect his precious teammates.
But I digress.
#naruto#Sasuke Uchiha#sakura haruno#naruto uzumaki#naruto shippuden#team 7#team kakashi#og team 7#naruto classic
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CRITICAL ROLE CAMPAIGN 3 EP 95 SPOILERS
jesus christ these nerds are going to kill me.
before i get into my think piece abt... everything that transpired at the end of this episode, i would like to say this is one of the best c3 episodes.... one of my favourite episodes of all time. idk idk.
essek? smut? astrid? poly bells hells allegations?? i was already fucking sold dawg. i cannot goddamn believe that this four hour episode was... mostly... a shopping episode. i cant wait for the new art, regardless of the batshitery that happened that kinda throws my vibes off. i digress.
oh ashton greymoore i love you so much. i have been so worried abt them but honestly they're probably the lat person im concerned for currently. the grief was so compelling to watch and taliesin is a master of roleplaying as minus charisma but genuinely charismatic in his dorky awkward gruff and fumbling way. his rizz is actually just blindsiding us with earnest acts of service and comfort for his friends and i think thats so neat. im happy that they're all going to aeor with fcg intertwined throughout their outfits. its poetic and also maddeningly sweet.
(love the little callowmoore moments sprinkled through this episode... they're so real to me)
pumat was fun and i am so damn glad they got all the items matt offered cause they were all so fucking cool.
also??? sugar daddy dorian storm??? yeah i see you gay boy. dorym is so real guys we need to prepare for a confession and soon. idk i get the vibe liam is gonna drop it in the most heartbreaking way. or robbie. they're both sick in the head tbh.
loved the little queer inn that essek dragged them to and the calm before the storm was genuinely the cutest shit ever and im glad they were having fun despite everything. we got the essek and ashton dunamancy scene that i have been begging for but i cant even talk abt that right now.
before i address orym and laudna...
delilah briarwood. im gonna fucking kill you. best believe that.
theres been so much discourse on twitter abt who was right or wrong or this or that, but ultimately the point is: neither of them is RIGHT. they're both stricken with trauma and grief, and motivated by the love they have for a) the ones orym has lost and b) the one laudna is fighting not to lose. laudna WAS worried abt orym before delilah twisted that into paranoia, and orym didnt wield that fuckass blade bc he DOESNT feel sick touching it.
he says its not abt revenge but... god. orym. you want revenge. call it whatever you like but you've been angry for a while.
laudna says she KNEW the sword was cursed, but she was lying or in denial abt the fact that delilah is the one who coerced her to hold the blade in her hand.
if either of them had decided to talk to each other or the group as a whole then this could have -- most likely -- been avoided. orym decided to take the blade and shoulder the burden of what it meant and what it represented so they didnt have. laudna felt betrayed and hurt but instead of trusting orym she was manipulated back into that cunt's clutches.
i dont prescribe to trauma olympics, especially when laudna and orym never actually denied each others' trauma with otohan and that blade so i think its slightly irrelevant when discussing them both.
(i will say this... otohans blade is what killed laudna but delilah is the one who had her in a cage when she was dead. otohan murdered oryms family and there was absolutely nothing that could save them. i firmly believe THAT is what chetney meant, not that laudna hasnt suffered so we can all just... unclench a little idk)
in all the discourse, lets not forget who the real villains are -- evil milfs (delilah and otohan). delilah chose this moment to sew distrust in laudna towards orym for a reason. its like the spider queen and opal. she NEEDS laudna isolated and dependent, and she cant sink her teeth in completely if laudna has someone to fall back on.
imodna... jesus imodna breaks me every time. that entire scene on the roof while laudna looks so much like her abuser -- the woman who MURDERED her -- and having that visage fade as laudna proclaims her love for imogen. peak romance and tragedy.
it was still so upsetting hearing the echoes of delilah as laudna spoke tho. knowing her hold on laudna is getting stronger and laudna has no real faith that she will be able to fight against her. hearing her ask imogen if shes still fun scary and knowing that imogen cant tell the truth. this isnt fun anymore. laudna is in danger and imogen doesnt know how to fix it.
"I'll always love you, Laudna. I just don't know what to do with it."
its uh its not looking good for our sapphics fellas.
anyway, i do think that ashton was the emotional mvp of this episode, especially while shit was escalating. putting themself between orym and laudna, PROTECTING laudna despite knowing she attacked him, TRUSTING that she was actually telling the truth and guiding her to see the forest for the trees and apologize for an irrational choice made through a mixture of trauma, delusion and paranoia.
im... excited? for the next episode? not sure why we keep having really horrible inter-party conflict the day before going on a suicide mission but the hells are my problem babies and i have to accept that they're just little fucked up guys.
god. is it thursday yet??
(AND WHERE THE HELL IS SAM)
#critical role#cr3#bells hells#critical role campaign 3#ashton greymoore#orym of the air ashari#laudna#imogen temult#dorian storm#chetney pock o'pea#fearne calloway#dorym#callowmoore#pvp#critical role c3#critical role spoilers#cr campaign 3#cr3 ep95#c3 e95#cr spoilers
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notes after rewatching fallout s1 ep4
• cooper and lucy wandering the desert and mans starts coughin', somethin' settin' in • whoa i just realized you could hear roger roaring from outside • roger was at a clinic, probably trying to find something to help him ☹️ • i wrote a whole entire post on this scene but anyways can i say we see full blown uncooked cannibalism hardly ten minutes into episode four like is everyone ok • the fact this scene is presented with a lot of tension, like a horror film and truly it's just a guy named roger fighting to stay not feral • i wonder how cooper met him? ghouls tend to know each other after a while [on account of the discrimination], i'm sure he was checking with this man every now and then tbh. perhaps. a friend. • cooper asks roger how he's feeling and he says "you know... it's hard out here. dang smoothies can be so unkind" and i just 😞 • "i see you got a smoothie of your own" ding ding ding ghoulcy this one's for you • you know what's particularly sad about ghoulification is for example that roger has had to isolate himself from others, even ghouls, because he was turning • roger asking for a vial and cooper looking at lucy [cooper, you botched the using lucy for bait, come on] • firmly in the camp that if cooper had vials left, he would give one to roger. cooper has shown himself to be crude and cruel seeming at times but i just know he went there with purpose • roger accepting he's turning and telling cooper and lucy to leave as a warning, roger seemed so nice, why and how did he get like this
• "i did ok" 😞 • going from standard human to turning into a feral ghoul in less than twenty eight years in the fallout universe is insane and idk if there's a lot of lore on why someone could end up like this and someone like cooper not • the difference in cooper's and roger's symptoms are pretty stark--- not entirely sold on him coughing and passing out is from ferality and more inclined to think chem withdrawals but i digress • "say, you remember how good food use to taste?" post war life is so bad, nobody in the wasteland remembers when food use to food 😭
• because roger is really nice and having a conversation, roger turns, speaking to lucy. cooper using this as an opportunity to kill roger seems so sudden and a betrayal until • look at cooper's eyes and his reaction after pulling the trigger--- not exactly the expression of someone who is in it "for the love of the game", in fact, i have come to view this act as a mercy kill • which is ironic of course because as we've all come to see, lucy does the exact thing for her own mother four episodes later • once feral, ghouls roam the wasteland operating on two instincts alone: hunger and defense. they are a threat to all those around them and i don't recall much on reversal. that's no life. roger would've turned feral and harmed them or others, it is sad • cooper mercy killing roger was in some ways compassionate, he had a sweet conversation with roger giving his last thoughts something warm and nice. cooper then going on to butcher and consume his flesh was an uh choice 💀
• and lucy immediately confused was like "wait?, why'd you do that? he was sick." i don't know if she entirely understands ghoulification, seems she thought maybe he could be helped • lucy is basically confused, begging cooper to not like, eat this guy 😭 • i'm gonna have to agree that he didn't have to eat roger, radroaches is everywhere and for free, still pondering if he did this to fuck with her or because some reason i am missing • cooper asking lucy what her name was [hold on, why he care about that?" and lucy so nearly coming this close to finding out what hank did and who cooper is [since she didn't ask his name] • "sometimes a fella's got to eat a fella" is my all time favourite quote in season one of this show lmao • cooper be funny as fuck for no reason like this man's brain is cooked • i would personally like to ask walton whose idea it was to go "mmm. mmm." while eating irradiated human flesh like that, like why is the pre war actor cooper howard like this • lucy is incomprehensibly disgusted but then goes on a thing [a vulnerable thing] about vault 32 starving [in the great plague of '77] and that she lost her mother during this time and that her father never resorted to cannibalism. there's some time and memory discrepancies here • "well there's what people say they did and what they really did" i wanted cooper to be wrong so bad here when he went on to clown hank by saying "i'll bet your daddy was first in line at the cookout. i bet he had a bib with a drawing of his neighbour's ass on it" • lmao they gave all the best lines to cooper, i'm sick, he was right • lucy, having had enough and not finding cooper's humour being used as a way to cope like this asks this disturbed little man • "how do you live like this? why keep going?" and for the briefest moment, and i do mean brief, cooper feels the crushing weight of who he is when lucy confronts him like this • of course he shakes off a moral inquiry and transfers it to another as he asks "why the fuck am i doing all the work?... ass jerky don't make itself." and forces lucy to do it instead • twice now this man has talked about ass in less than ten minutes and for everyone's sake i'll move along 💀
• woody basically trying to interrogate the raider prisoners and getting nothing, meanwhile--- i think they already starting to be poisoned • ooo ok but betty telling norm he's the last standing maclean in the vault so his words carry and people listen. it occurred to me maybe he inadvertently inspired the poisonings of the raiders but it's also occurring to me that because they couldn't just all be shot outright, being poisoned was the best follow through method, nobody notices until it's already too late. now who is sneaky enough for that? • "when clever boys like you are angry, you're lucky not to have seen where that can lead." so... was betty present for shady sands? hmm • betty asking norm to tread lightly is very... not a threat, but she's watching him, right
• ok! we have that second water scene. it's confirmed here cooper is fetching water from an irradiated source [hence why denying lucy any makes sense] he puts it in his canteen and drinks it just fine. lucy is obviously mindlessly thirsty because she defeatedly drops down to drink the murky, stagnant irradiated water. it's so irradiated, her pip boy is going crazy, she literally gags in the scene • "now you're getting it. how does this golden rule jibe with what's going through your head now?" well i mean we knew cooper been fucking with her the whole time and showing her the wasteland streets but it is also unlikely she would have found a clean water source where they are, i guess her getting radiation sickness may have been inevitable but cooper denying her water kept her from being sick • after another insane string of sentences from this centuries old movie star, lucy finally asks "what are you?" and it's more like "what the fuck is wrong with you?" • "oh i'm you, sweetie, you just give it a little time" is majorly menacing after everybody just drank stagnant rad water like it's koolaid • cooper felt so smug then was zapped with karma again because he has a coughing fit directly after telling lucy this lmao • walton has such a good old man cough ❤️ • lucy takes cooper coughing up a lung as an opportunity to run [where i don't know but] • cooper uses his lasso skills he used to use at kid's parties to pull lucy back and then says some shit like "where you think you going? you ain't going nowhere."
• so we have arrived at the infamous and intriguing finger biting off scene--- can i just say she bit his finger off with such ease and then! cooper doesn't even act like it hurt, he seems... pleased he got that kind of reaction out of lucy. he's like into it 💀 • "there you are, you little killer" i'll keep this pg13 and say cooper really wanted to get a rise out of lucy, to bring the dog out of her, huh • he... then proceeds to cut her [corresponding hand's] finger off. ironically applying the "do unto others as you would have done unto you" tit for tat, if you will • i was surprised he did this because like ok, she spat it out? pick it up and reattach it, fella 😭 but there's more under the surface here because • cooper says "now that right there is the closest thing we've had to an honest exchange so far." and he's being framed in a close up so close, you can see his dainty eyelashes, sun shining in the background, his hazel eyes sparkling--- this is not on accident ☝️ gdgkdkfd • there's a lot of symbolism to be had but for now, i'll save that for next episode notes when cooper does the thing • ah chet! and steph. i kinda am of the idea she strategically got with him but anyways! who wouldn't! chet hot as fuck! and steph look like an assassin • bert's shoes so small gldgldfl • steph is definitely angry and sad dealing with bert's death in her own special way [trying to fuck chet] • excuse me but why they turned an almost sex scene into a birthing scene 😭💀 • lucy been walking the wasteland without a shoe, how she do it 😭 • i did not pick up on cooper bartering lucy for two months' worth of vials [thanks subtitles] • "mint condition" [looks at a bloody stump on hand] "near mint condition" now who fault is this?? lmao • "you got problems out here too, sweetheart" like, shut up 😭 • cooper every time he interacts with a mr. handy is one of the only few places he gets to hear a voice of this old friend • "best you try your luck behind that door" well at least he untied her • this is like the third time he's gotten instant karma with lucy because either he pretended to keep it together until she went in or genuinely didn't know he was going to pass out but • went through the five stages of grief trying to figure who he sold her to because i deadass was thinking the same thing lucy was 😭 • lucy being given the finger of like, a corpse or something because it's grey 😭 forever changed by the wasteland, always carrying a little bleakness and death with her ❤️ • lucy never experiencing real cotton [or maybe only rarely] • lucy calling cooper a creature 😭 • "he put a leash around my neck and made me drink from puddle water that i'm pretty sure was some kind of animal pee" sending 😭 she talking to this evil mr. handy like it's a person • her recounting her captivity with cooper like he was simply being mean to her is just • "and i thought i was here to be a sex slave." "what?! no! what a disgusting idea. i'm simply going to harvest your organs." damn, fallout which one is worse, like fuck---
• hope the jello cake veronica got wasn't poisoned... • "what are you looking at?" "a murderer in a cage, paying the price for what you did to us. for what you did to the innocent people in vault 32" and norm gets circumstantial evidence from a raider by accidentally cross examining one of them with it being more than anything woody could coax out of them • one thing about the macleans, they smart • i also think it's excellent writing that intrigue was spurred like this by a raider saying vault 32 wasn't innocent because they were running an experiment like all the vaults did, everything isn't so black and white • norm reads every situation correctly because why he read chet by saying chet came along to investigate because norm reminds him of lucy fkdgkdkg • still piecing together the full extent of vaults 31, 32, 33 together but at first i couldn't understand why it looked like so many took their own lives--- apparently them discovering what vault 31 was about started a rebellion but two years seemed so recent to me. curious how this overlaps with shady sands if it does • they showed the spooky ass rat utopia experiment still playing on the tvs in there but i wasn't sure if this was explicit about that being vault 32's experiment
• lucy being prompted to continue on because of a flashback from her mom upon awakening 🥲 • "lucy sweetie what are you doing out here?" and those were her memories on the surface [nevermind cooper calling her [[condescendingly]] "sweetheart"] • i did not realize the ghouls were being kept in the freezers but it looks like they either only sell ghouls or keep the ghouls "on ice" [not unlike how dom pedro would keep cooper and cut pieces off of him] and collect the organs of standard people right then and there • "sir, you can't do this. please, i need my organs" lucy, it's just a robot bulter, he's not a real guy 😭 • the way lucy got out of this pickle quick, almost got snip snipped but short circuited the murderbot • lucy putting her murdercap on and putting drano in the murderbot's syringes, clever girl • it was so "star wars" of her to treat mr. handy like a person and then the guys running the organ trafficking scheme going "you might as well be holding an air conditioner hostage" 😭 • the organ traffickers running the super duper mart ring are so dull and banal evil types, it's so satire
• i just registered those two organ trafficker guys got a camera and can see cooper laid out in front of the store • lucy freeing the ghouls 🥲and one even thanking her [even the feral ones 💀] • poor martha, i peep how we see lucy's grey finger and it being shown used to defend herself against martha in her feral state • organ traffickers got ate up bless • nothing lucy did besides shoot was going to honestly stop martha, sometimes your pacifist playthrough doesn't go as planned • the pip boys still being on and running on the not alive people in vault 32 • "death to management" and it's directly the reference to vault 31's experiment, right there
• lucy walking out of there with mismatched shoes but two shoes nonetheless ☝️ • i guess lucy sincerely did not comprehend cooper is a ghoul or ghoulification, i suppose most vault dwellers literally would never know, that's post war history, wow • lucy asking cooper about if the vials keep him from going feral and he cannot even speak, he can only nod, from a prone position, on the ground--- the power/framing trade off is excellent • lucy bends down, briefly rolls the gun in her hand, while cooper lies helpless, she delivers a fatal line • "i may end up looking like you. but i'll never be like you" harbouring not enough ill will against him despite mistreatment, she gives cooper several vials, directly near his hand. didn't have to do none of that shit! • if i was cooper, i'd be scared as hell of this lady, she took down an organ trafficking ring in a grocery store ran by two armed guys, a murderbot, with some feral ghoul hostages, all of the bad and dangerous people fucking died • she really could've ended cooper right then and there, his devotion in season two gone be unmatched lmao
• i truly think he had a hint of a smile on his face after she helped [save his life] by anyways • lucy walks into the proverbial sunset meanwhile this man shambles into super duper mart about to go on the biggest bender the wasteland has seen since the bombs dropped • cooper gets so fucked up, i lost count how many things he ingested, king said all of 'em • cooper is so goddamn famous, his film "the man from deadhorse" is just sitting next to a tv • you could say here is where cooper has a crisis of conscience whereupon he holds the tape in his hand but truly we know already he had that centuries ago when he filmed "the man from deadhorse"
• cooper watching the scene, the very moment in his life where things started to shift--- he tries to cock an invisible fun, being unable as he remembers his trigger finger is gone [neutral, disarmed, here's where i think he decides he wants to sew on lucy's finger to his hand] it's like he's starting over, a moral rebirth but with his trigger finger • they really made cooper say "you commie son of a bitch" in a western, just ugly propaganda • let's examine "feo, fuerte, y formal" again! "ugly, strong, dignity" does post war cooper have two out of three on that front? is this his step into regaining dignity again? • cooper was always playing characters, it was expected of him and he got paid for it. it feels like a wall is being torn down, something is being shed here. and maybe it's this character he's masquerading as • cooper and lucy both having revelations in the super duper mart--- lucy realising you can't always reason and logic out of a situation and cooper being confronted with the fact you can keep your morality and sense of self intact and a horrible place and situation doesn't have to change you
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hey there!
I kind of consider you the resident dnp expert (at least in dnp culture) so I wanted your opinion on a question that's been building for a while now.
What are the boundaries for dnp now?
There are so many things that I feel have changed even in the last four years: writing smutty rpf was Gross and Weird, along with art along that line, speculating about their relationship was ABSOLUTELY a no-go, all things that I see happening on Tumblr now. And I'm not saying that's a bad thing!! I'm just acknowledging things have changed over time. They're different people now and so are we, and the "we know you know" era is lots of fun.
I was browsing reddit today (bad idea, do not recommend) and came across a post from a new Phannie asking if DnP were in a relationship. And while I agree that we cannot say for absolute certain that they are, the responses had a VERY different vibe than on here, emphasizing how bad the speculation was (true) and essentially saying "don't even think about that, just enjoy their content." (or something to that extent.)
Which... is very different from this here website in which we joke about them being horney for each other constantly lmao.
Being a very rules-driven person, I like expectations to be made abundantly clear for pretty much everything. So that's why I want to ask: Is there a line here? Are we crossing that line? How defined is that line? (All of this, of course, I recognize is your opinion and yours alone, and if this is posted I encourage anyone else to share their two-cents in a respectful way.)
Obviously, trying to find out where they live/things like that is very clearly crossing a boundary. But is there some sort of limit or boundary I (and tbh the rest of the phandom), in your opinion, should be keeping in mind?
thanks xx
hi!
'resident expert' is a hefty title, i'm just here trying my best!
'what are the boundaries for dnp now?' is really a great question. cause the thing is, we used to know. there used to be a fairly well-defined and mostly agreed upon line, and ever since the dapg revival in particular, the line keeps moving.
i'll be honest, i never really saw phanfic as rpf, even though it is. my stance on phanfic is the same as dnps: it's a beautiful expression of art and creativity and is so, so important. they've always been pro-fic (even though we subjected them to some absolutely horrific crack fics), so i don't think 'smutty' fic has ever been gross or too far. they've given their blessing, and, as the conversation has been in fandom communities the last few years, rpf isn't 'for' the people in them, it's for the fans. so i digress.
art is much the same way. they love art! they even included art of them kissing in a tumblr tag video back in the day, so to say that's not allowed especially after they're out is kind of crazy to me.
i think the line with stuff like that was showing it directly to dnp--tagging them in explicit stuff, that kind of thing. but creating it? go for it! it's always been a green light. (i think fans have previously overpoliced this and we lost a lot of great fic, art, and community members over it)
browsing reddit is always a Choice. i've never participated on dnp reddit before but i am aware that it is an entirely different space than here. something that's important, i think (and i think you think this too as you're asking about them), is to respect the fandom rules of the place you partcipate in. tumblr is generally one of the most phan-positive places on the internet, especially publicly facing. we make a lot of relationship jokes, particularly because we run on the assumption it's already true, based on what they've both said publicly (mostly dan).
i won't comment on reddit specifically just because i'm not a part of the community there, but the speculation about dnp online was a Lot for a long time. but the worst part of it was the stalking, the digging into personal lives, the contacting family members--that is what was bad. dnp have always had a connection--and, honestly, they kind of love flexing it and kind of always have. they absolutely play into things now, but they certainly did even way before coming out too. i think a certain level of speculation was to be expected, especially in that era of online fandom. but it wasn't just the 'teenage girls' who cared, the media did too, and so did many others.
i think one of the biggest differences now is 1 the awareness of 'our' past and trying to make up for it, and 2 the broader societal conversations about parasocial relationships.
you see this reflected on the snippets ive seen from dnp reddit and dnp twitter. they tend to be Very 'cautious' about the words they say, often undercutting perfectly reasonable statements with 'but whatever their relationship is'. on one hand, they don't want to cross a line, and i can respect that. on the other hand... it's 2024 babes. they just put out merch of them holding hands. dan's directly, intentionally, and explicitly called phil a bottom on dapg. they reacted to all of the pinofs, made jokes about 'theyre touching', and even joked about the tackle being 'wrestling 👀'. dan posted half-naked catboy pics and showed us phil was taking them. the 'watch your step babygirl' tweet & their reactions to it. phil is credited in WAD. they're making threesome jokes about themselves as a unit. i could go on and on.
to me, there's a few things that have 'moved the line' for us, so to speak.
1 - DAPG returning. for the last few years they specifically were not a duo (for projects) anymore. (and no, not because they hated each other). they just weren't. they wanted to focus on their goals and projects. they didn't have to resurrect dapg, but they chose to. marketing and money aside, they knew that if this went over well, it would well and truly revive the 'dan and phil' brand again. it would be specifically returning to being a duo in the public eye. (however they've also fully embraced this in all aspects, including merch, videos, and general attitude)
2 - pinof reacts. even though they'd been out since 2019, we hadn't had regular joint content from them since before that, therefore, while they had become more comfortable with themselves and their 'outness', we hadn't (in terms of them making explicit gay jokes together). so i really think dnp had to de-fang a lot of the 'theyre touching' of it all, because we didn't really know where we stood on it anymore. i think they succeeded, too. we couldn't be here, with the content of the last 3 months, without them tackling it head on (well, as head on as they're want to do).
3 - dapc. genuinely another big shift. they did this for the real fans. purely a passion project, and a specific choice in doing the handhold. they know what we're like. and this wasn't a brief, unplanned, unscripted moment. it's a specifically blocked out scene. they know it's opening a door, and they chose to. this is doubled by the fucking iconic merch selling, and furthered by phil's twitter likes of arguably romantic phanart, and then dan's full straddle like.
even throughout the current 6 months of revival, the line has moved. i don't know where it will settle. dnp keep moving it, in my opinion, and, genuinely, i don't think it's going to leave much to the imagination. as you say, obviously not the stalking or the contacting, but beyond that? especially here on tumblr? i wouldn't get too worried. obviously people will have their opinions, but as long as you're generally respectful and recognize that humans will see your posts and humans interact with them, i think you're good.
my rule of thumb is anything they intentionally put on the table, we can joke about or at the same level. but in terms of art/fic? go off, live your dreams. dan and phil would want you to.
#i didn't include a cut because people don't always look under them and this is generally a whole statement. feel free to add things.#there's specific discourse i dont partake in. doesnt mean you have to avoid it entirely. but just dont bring it up to dnp and you're fine.#dnp#dan and phil#phan#<- for the fandometrics#c.text#answered
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So I wanted to write a short post about Splinter's relationship with Donnie, but I realised I need to give it more context, so here we are. This is going to be an analysis on the similarities between Splinter and Donnie, and how those similarities affect their relationship.
Let's start with the easiest example, given to us in "Breaking purple":
(sorry for the bad quality gif)
Donnie, as we know, isn't good at understanding his own emotions and expressing them, and he's also not that good at understanding other's emotions. This video essay explains his low empathy really well.
Donnie doesn't know how to deal with emotions, so he does the next best thing - looks at adult example and copies it.
Splinter, while loving his sons and wanting the best for them, is objectively not the best father. He was thrown into fatherhood with no preparation after being imprisoned for over a decade and turning into a rat. He clearly has depression, has no friends, no support system, etc. And the only reference he has for parenting is his grandpa.
So similarity one, they're not good at dealing with emotions.
The second similarity is they're both bad at lying. And, more importantly, bad at noticing when they're being lied to:
(Arguably, you can say they were all too focused on trying to get away with their own lie, but I digress.)
Donnie needs to be said stuff directly. He's shown to not get sarcasm quite often:
And Splinter is shown multiple times to be quite unobservant:
Like, this gif is from when he grounds them, and he just accepts that those four flour sacks are his sons and moves on.
Which leads us to the third similarity, of them both missing obvious social cues. Donnie because of his social skills, and Splinter because he's unobservant.
There's more similarities, like their love of dancing for example, but the reason I gave those similarities is because I want to talk about their relationship.
Splinter, again, wasn't a very good father. He didn't know how to raise his children, but you can see he did make an effort. They all never hesitate to hug him, to call him Dad, and even when they find out Lou Jitsu is their biological father, they never doubt his role as their dad for a second. Which shows that even though he was neglectful, he did have a positive impact on their lives. They love him, and he loves them.
But, one line stood out to me the most, and that's this Donnie line:
Why? Because Splinter always looks extremely proud of his sons, and it sounds odd that he never told Donnie he's proud of him. And we know he desperately want to hear him say it:
So Splinter never told him he's proud of him, but he's also going to say it three times in this episode, only finishing the sentence once when Donnie isn't close enough to hear. Not only that, but the first instance is because Donnie made him a booster, which looks like a very minor thing, so he has no issue saying he's proud of them even because of the tiniest thing.
If so, then why is Donnie missing the verbal validation so much?
Splinter is not good with knowing when to express his feelings and how, and he's not really observant. Just like he never actually said he's proud of Donnie to Donnie's face in this episode, my guess he never said it to his face in the past too. Like, he tried, but he never actually finished the sentences when Donnie could hear, and he probably didn't even notice.
I'm also guessing he used acts to show how proud he is (for example, the fact he didn't hesitate to choose the Turtle Tank for the demolition derby shows how proud he is of Donnie's work), but because of Donnie's need to be told everything literally, he didn't feel the validation from him at all.
I feel like out of the four turtles, Donnie has the rockiest relationship with Splinter. He logs every interaction they have, doesn't immediately trust him when he offers to spend time together, gets mad at him the most often out of the four of them, etc. But you can also see he loves his dad, and he outright tells him this in "Turtle-dega Nights: The Ballad of Rat Man":
Anyways, I'm just really passionate about showing Splinter isn't just an abusive uncaring father, and showing that the turtles know this.
(Just learned there's an "alt text" option for images so I just removed the image id and turned it into alt text instead.)
#rise of the tmnt#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt analysis#rise donnie#rise donatello#rise splinter#this is my first post on this blog and I overthought it way too much it took me two days to finish writing this#save rottmnt#save rise of the tmnt#I really like these turtles#remi rants#accesible#alt text#remi analysis#rottmnt gifs
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towl spoilers below!!!!!!!!!
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late briefing but it’s here and that’s what matters!!!!! let’s get into this episode! ❤️🔥
this episode was amazing. no notes. angst fuels me, so keep it coming in episode four along with some loving intimacy! 🤝
michonne is the most clever, headstrong, charismatic, fearless powerhouse of a woman in the entirety of twdu. there is no situation nor circumstance that she cannot handle. no matter the time, skill, or hardship that woman is going to do whatever she fucking wants. she’s such an admirable character, and yes this is just a fictional show but she means so much to me. tv mom forever and ever and ever. my lovebug!!!! 🫶🏼
rick… my og lovebug. his selfless, tender hearted yet courageous and dangerous personality is sooo missed recently because of these losers who love to keep playing hide the donkey. he’s been so beaten down and forced into the caged mindset, also known as stockholm syndrome. it hurts so much to see it affect him so deeply, especially in this episode. we truly get to understand just how horrified he is of losing michonne, losing judith, losing their home. it’s so layered that he’s come to the conclusion that he has to do whatever it takes to protect his wife and their children (judith for now until further notice). even going as far as pretending to break michonne’s heart just to get her to go back home for the sake of a safe and secured future. and as much as it rips his entire psyche into shreds, this man is a family man. his priority in life is to protect the ones that he loves by all means necessary.
and thank fucking HEAVENS that despite their years apart, michonne knows her husband like the back of her palm and can read him like a book!!! every word that poured out of his mouth was utter bullshit merely for safety purposes and i’m soooo glad that she understood that without even having to retaliate verbally.
she retaliated by throwing them out of a moving chopper LMAOOO 😭 MY GIRL, MY LEADING LADY!!!!!! CAN WE MAKE SOME NOISE FOR THE CRAZIEST CHARACTER IN THE ROOM. thank youuuuuu! i digress.
“we needed a timeout” shdjshdhsjdjs well yes! please knock some sense into your traumatized husband. he needs his wife!!!
moving forward. the phones!!!! “believe a little bit longer”!!!!! CARL MENTION!!!!!!??????!!!!! 😨🫨🥺☹️😖 rick not mentioning any names for three years and never liking any drawings of his son because they could never be depicted perfectly 😣😣😣 try not to cry challenge [FAILED]. punching me in the gut would hurt less. still hoping for a random chandler cameo too :D
i know that what rick said was absolutely fake and futile but as a fierce michonne lover… HER FACE AS HE SPOKE??? if we don’t see him loving on her endlessly in episode four… i might throw myself out of a moving helicopter.
one hundred percent positive that they’ll be pouring bisquick and making pancakes next episode. i’m sat.
thorne is a D. not an A. she’s a piece of shit and will be dealt with eventually. michonne will handle any light work. i rest my case.
jadis is a sexual predator and a grade-A loser with a shit haircut. i almost pissed myself laughing when rick said that. he’s been waiting and so have i!!!! 😁 but yeah she sucks. die asap.
RICHONNE KISS IN THE WOODS AFTER BEING A POWERHOUSE COUPLE. 🥹 reminded me so much of when they took those cars and drove into that herd of walkers. ugh. please put their entire love story into the louvre.
last but not least because i’m tired — unsure what beale is up to. he’s so sketchy, and also SO CONFUSED about rick supposedly having a briefing with him about being promoted?! NO. no thanks we didn’t ask for him to ever be a leader nor get kidnapped in the first place!!!! scared to see what lies ahead for the next three episodes :(((((
in conclusion, michonne is the most beautiful angel to walk the earth. she looked so hot in every single scene. episode three is hands down my favorite episode yet, despite the hardship. again, angst fuels me. so excited to see what’s in store next week, and every other week after that!!!! it’s only up from here. ❤️🔥⬆️
okay that’s it. hope everyone enjoyed the episode!!!! this is such a wild ride, and i’m happy to have my television parents back on my screen, making things happen again. 🌟🔥
#trips talks#towl spoilers#the ones who live#the walking dead#rick grimes#richonne#michonne grimes#towl
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well students,
i really thought we might get have a nice quiet weekend without the resident wannabe-queen-bees trying to make a play for the kingdom. but here we are with grassy checking in for duty posting their harangue against the 'opinions everyone is entitled to, but cling to the pr angle and isn't it weird...'. normally i write this fool off to another wannabe-mean-girl who thinks they're doing something while no one actually cares about them. but, they've made posts policing this fandom (and me, but i'm more focused on the fandom) and i feel the need to share my piece. since everyone is entitled to their opinion and all.
this person made an account to purely give attention to the 'delulus' they can't stand and call out 'bad behavior'. yes, those delulus are fucking insane and need to be called out; but isn't what you're doing giving them the attention they want? it's all you talk about. this constant back and forth, launching thought turds to try start a fandom war is played out. but now you are going after the people who think this might be pr and lumping them in with the crazies? i hope you are including yourself with the crazies, because you sure are one. everyone is entitled to their opinion, right? just not these people who are discussing a celebrity's relationship on their blogs or in group chats. and probably not my opinion when you read this (hi!) and start using terms you don't understand to call me names. imo you are trash just like the rest of them. you and your friends are deeply concerned about those group chats, aren't you? odd. but i digress.
why do you care so much what these mods think, when by your own accord, they aren't harming anyone or sending nasty notes or hate? sorry, i added that last part, but it is implied by your other posts. you spend so much time fighting to confirm a marriage that isn't yours. you give the 'delulus' airtime time and time again. are you that bothered by people disagreeing with you? and why does it automatically have to be jealousy if someone doesn't believe the bill of goods they are being sold? fyi, seeing the awkwardness or plot holes is not confirmation bias. maybe these fans are trying to grapple with the upset of their favorite actor not living up to ideals he has claimed to hold. maybe they are just trying to continue to enjoy his projects without associating her in them. we do not have to bring her into absolutely every conversation about him, but both dumb ass 'teams' sure try. and yes, his wife is plenty problematic. she may not have directly said the horrible things her friends have and then tried to throw (at least one of) those friends under the bus, but you know what is said: when someone sits down at a table with three nazis, and if they don't call them out, there are four nazis at the table.
so what's the real reason for your constant vitriol and desperate attempt to make people 'see the truth'? why are you fighting so hard for a relationship that isn't yours? do you, just like those 'delulus', think you'll get some big prize for being his biggest defender? you don't want to have genuine conversation with anyone, you just want to argue your point of view time and time again. you want everyone to see things through your lens and agree with your confirmation bias.
yes, you, your friends, and the delulus all just love to police the fandom. i thought it was a joke when i was told about the constant policing, but here you all are, over and over, day after day. telling people what to think, telling people what to post, cruising around tumblr to comment on posts that have nothing to do with you. for what? i'm starting to believe the rumblings that you all are part of the plot to advance a certain narrative and keep the nunemployed at the forefront of the discussion. i can't prove it, but again, it's rumored.
i'll close with some words you might recognize, grassy.
these two people do not know you. they don’t care how you feel about them. you will likely never meet or know them in your lifetime. therefore it is really weird to INSIST you are right about certain things happening in their lives and/or behind the scenes when absolutely none of his fandom knows anything beyond what he presents to us.
think about it for a while. why do you care so much if someone doesn't believe this narrative? are you getting paid for this? because if not, it is very strange to be this invested in someone else's marriage. maybe you are jealous because you aren't married. i don't know. but jealousy is your go to.
from the archives: you once told people they would be accepted by you and your ilk if they admitted they were wrong. that announcement and offer gave very strange, cult leader- like vibes. so fucking odd. so here's this -if you can admit you're just a bitch who wants tumblr notoriety (HA) and has an axe to grind, we'll accept you. there's no prize for being an asshole online. ce will never care if you were his greatest warrior on the world wide web. you're just another asshole existing on the same coin with the others and think you are better than everyone else.
i will definitely be using tags on this. i will continue to use them. and as you say: most people are doing no harm. they are discussing things in private chats, but i understand that you all are so upset about not being invited. i promise, being honest with yourself will set you free.
and grassy? shove your dollar store, rip off musing up your ass.
#this is your principal speaking#fandom drama#chris evans#chris evans fandom#chris evans shitshow#fandom behaviour#fandom police#celebrity gossip#celeb fandom#celebrity relationships#pr shitshow
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in light of Cecil's Big Day, i have a nice story for anyone who cares to read it:
i took a bus from california to new york city in 2016, and i stayed for four days -- freshly 19 and completely alone. when i got to my airbnb after three days on a series of buses, i was hit by a profound loneliness unlike anything i've ever felt. something about the solitude i thought i was familiar coupled with physical distance, and boy did i cry in that dusty, musky $70 a night room i got myself.
but i digress!
while i was in the city i of course planned to do new york city things. being obsessed with wtnv at the time, i bought myself a ticket to a Too Much Light Makes The Baby Go Blind, which was a Neo-Futurists performance where they tried to do 60 short plays in 60 minutes (if they managed to, everyone got pizza at the end). several wtnv cast and crew were part of the Neo-Futurists, so i wanted to check it out. there was a rotating cast, but i got lucky enough to see Meg Bashwinner perform!
one of the plays they did that night involved each cast member approaching a random audience member. the message was one of letting go. the cast members had objects with some sentimental value to them, and they told their audience member the story behind the item before giving it to them.
not only did meg bashwinner approach me of all people, she gave me THIS
...the all access pass she, and the other wtnv cast/crew, used for a tour that i WENT to!!!
i was so incredibly alone, and here a member of a podcast that meant so much to me just so happened to give me something that meant a lot to her.
the world really can be as weird and beautiful as wtnv presents it, and i overflow with love when it reminds me
#wtnv#welcome to night vale#cecil baldwin#tumblr sexymen poll#also its not lost on me that i received this in an act of letting go and have held on to it for seven years lmao#i promise i will give it away next time i see wtnv live :)
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no no because why is chipp kind of daisuke’s self insert?
hear me out. I know that he sort of designed sol as the character who’s the most like ‘him’ in a manner, which we know through several interviews and stuff + it makes so much sense that the writer and creator of the series would create the main character to be an extension of himself. but chipp? listen I love chipp as much as the next dude but he’s such a weird dude. he’s been one of the only characters (who isn’t main cast) in gg to be CONSISTENTLY RELEVENT through a lot of the games. it’s no secret that daisuke likes to repeat his characters on and off, giving some of them spotlight and the others the bench. but chipp has been a MAIN PART in the past FOUR GAMES which isn’t something you could argue for most of the cast. additionally he plays the same role: deus ex machina + random hero. in most of the plot, chipp is just kinda There to save people or to continue on the plot. in fact, ky and leo might be dead if he hadn’t interfered with ariels in xrd rev. but I digress. he’s always a big part of the plot without figuring into main cast, and further more he’s always there to save the day. he’s always the hero and a HUGE part of the plot, despite being a side character. daisuke just really likes chipp, i guess.
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Hi there. I'm back with theory #3 for Sylus' myth. Which....might be less evidence-heavy than the first two and really just me talking out of my ass. I started writing at midnight because that's just on brand clown behavior of me 🙃 ANYWAY...
People who haven't read Rafayel, Xavier, and Zayne's myths, please tread carefully, because I will touch upon them briefly and allude to events in their myths.
Quick recap from first post:
Theory 1: Sylus and MC must have been destined lovers in a past life, but due to whatever conflict, Sylus decided to break his bond with her for her protection and accept any punishment that comes with it, which could mean to be ruler of a place he has no desire for, an imprisonment of sort.
Theory 2: Destined lovers, but perhaps a third party interfered out of jealousy or spite. Could Sylus have been caught and framed of a crime and been literally imprisoned, thus forcing him and MC to separate?
So...I half-joked in a post that my new theory is that Sylus sold his soul to the devil. Or, you know, maybe he is the devil himself. This is partly stemmed from the Long-Awaited Revelry trailer, which has the word "demon" over a shot of him and later in the same trailer, one of Sylus' companion forms is aptly titled "Otherworldly Visitor". Make of that as you will.
And with the new trailer for No Defense Zone, we see that Sylus' right eye glows in a demonic way, similar to his in the LAR trailer. Even the atmosphere in both scenes seem a bit supernatural. Now....I didn't want to go there, but, um................do you suppose he is an incubus? 😭😭😭 The shot after "demon" has the word "desire," which can have a sexual connotation.
For those who don't know, an incubus is a male demon who preys on women sexually.......it would explain his kinky behavior in NDZ 💀 but I digress.......
Some of the first lines we hear from Sylus:
"Even if you wanted to sell your soul, you still have to find someone who can pay the price."
"Want some help? Yes? No? Maybe so?"
These lines reinforce the idea of "deal with the devil". In the new theme song, Visions opposées, the singer also sings this line: "Mais c'est le prix à payer" (But that's the price to pay). It could just be figurative, or it could hold some literal truth, because I found it interesting how that verse overlaps with Sylus' scenes. I doubt it's a coincidence since the devs are so good at planting seeds.
From the chorus, in order, we hear:
[MINOR RAFAYEL, XAVIER, & ZAYNE SPOILERS]
"But that's the price to pay / o'love" - Rafayel, God of the Sea, is separated by MC. His price? His civilization.
"Stars will always shine / But with pain" - Xavier and MC are separated (side note: I don't have the second half of Xavier's first myth yet, so I can't elaborate too much. But I've seen enough references to understand the scene depicted in the MV)
"Though separated / Hearts cling on" - Zayne (The Foreseer) is separated from MC in many lifetimes. The memories of their love are tied to the jasmine flowers even if they forget.
[END SPOILERS]
"That's the price to pay / Yet lovers endure forevermore"
This is the verse that plays over Sylus' scene. What is his price? Does the following verse mean that he and MC must always endure something? Hardship? Misfortune?
When the chorus repeats a second time near the end, all of the above verses coincide with the intended love interest. It absolutely can be argued that all four love interests paid a price for their love, and not just Sylus. This whole tangent was brought up to follow with the whole "deal with the devil" aspect. As stated previously, I wouldn't be surprised if the devs and songwriters intended for the lyrics to have layers upon layers of meaning in relation to the stories.
Also take into consideration the lyrics from the song in Sylus' first official trailer, Tangible Shackles:
The outlaw again celebrates this encounter in fate It's time to break the seal they set in mind It's time they will have to pay the price
To me, though, in this song, the verse sounds very vengeful. It sounds almost vindictive, as if someone must be punished for whatever wrongdoing done against Sylus.
Watching the interview for Visions opposées, it seems the LADS team has shared enough of the intended stories for the songwriters to understand and pen the songs we hear. I trust that there will be complete clarity to the lyrics once we're able to understand Sylus' myth.
Love is the privilege of mortals
A gift the gods covet in vain
Astra, you ass, is that you
Now remember the first official trailer for Sylus? Yeah. Long-Awaited Revelry. Do you know what "revelry" mean? 'Cause I sure as heck didn't and kept wanting to read it as rivalry
revelry. noun. a situation in which people are drinking, dancing, singing, etc. at a party or in public, especially in a noisy way. — Cambridge Dictionary
To put it simply, "long-awaited party," which with the new knowledge of the timeline of scenes shown, we can clearly see a scene of MC entering a ballroom where Sylus is at in the trailer.
What type of party is this? Long-awaited? Maybe an engagement? In the MV, you can catch a brief glimpse of guests in the background watching MC enter. It seems almost like Sylus is waiting to show her off. The dance they share also seem intimate, and Sylus' expression is very soft and tender.
Previously, I alluded that it looks like MC and Sylus' wrist are bounded by a thread, similar to the Red Thread of Fate, but afterwards, I had my doubts, and if in keeping with the theme of being trapped, perhaps they were actually cuffed? I have previously mentioned that handcuffs have shown up often in the trailers.
To be cuffed together makes it seem like it wasn't a choice for one or both people. Kind of pondering if maybe MC might have sold her soul to Sylus, thus becoming bounded to him?
I have also made a lot of references to the myth of Hades and Persephone previously (still holding onto it with every fiber of my being tbqh), BUT for the sake of this third theory, let's revise the above scene to mean...
Sylus, a demonic creature, is trapped on the dark side while MC is a mortal on the light side (mortal realm). He knows their love can never be, so he forces whatever bond they made together to break, setting her free to remain in the mortal realm while he remains trapped in the Underworld.
Interestingly, Sylus conjures up a gun, pressing it to his chest where his heart would be. And he makes MC shoot him. ....thus breaking their bond? Or killing him idk man
This appears to be the following appearance of him after he is shot in his chair:
I'm sorry if this seems out of left field and my mind works in a weird way, but.....the scene above kind of made me think of the Roman/Greek myth for Cupid/Eros and Psyche. Rather, I was thinking of the scene where after her jealous sisters manipulated her and planted seeds of doubts, Psyche betrays her husband's trust and broke her promise to not view his face and learn of his identity. She carries a dagger with the intention of killing him.
In the aforementioned myth, Psyche does journey into the Underworld during a final trial set forth by Cupid/Eros' mother, Venus/Aphrodite. Other than that, there might not be many other correlations I can make in regard to the scene depicted in Visions opposées.
Speaking of Cupid (Roman name, but aka Eros in Greek mythology), however, it's also worth noting that Cupid was described as a "demon of fornication" by some mythographers. Take this part with a grain of salt since this was due to adapting the Roman myth for Christian usage. I do, however, vaguely recalled in some Greek/Roman myths, Eros/Cupid was viewed as devious by the other gods due to him being able to make both mortals and the gods fall in love depending on his whims, be it out of mischievousness or malice.
So....Cupid....God of desire....erotic love.............that earlier incubus comment I made?? 😭 This part I am definitely pulling out of my ass. 💀 Let's just wrap this post up. 🫠
If we look at the myth from the angle that Sylus is a demon, then....
Theory 3: Sylus is a demon who has come across MC, and for whatever reason, she is desperate to make a deal with a demon, thus bounding herself to him. Perhaps over time, Sylus grows to adore her, but maybe MC betrays his trust, whether it be intentional or at the manipulation of others? Could he have tested her when he made her shoot him? Was he willing to die for her, even if it's at her hands?
Uhhhh.....yeah. This theory seems more far-fetched. 🫠 Well, thanks for your time! If any of the crumbs I've presented stirred any theories from you all, I'd love to hear it! Bye. 💕
#love and deepspace#love and deepspace sylus#lnds analysis#lnds ramblings#i have got to stop writing things after midnight#🗿#i still think there is a heavy borrowing of greek mythology#yes i was that child that went through a greek myth geek phase and devoured everything i could#i will do a follow up post after reading the myth to see how far off i was lol
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TPOT 10 spoilers 'cause BH makes me insane
I mean, c'mon. You can't see this thumbnail and think things are gonna be ok for you mentally if you like blackhole. Like you know what's coming to you.
First things first, let me just scream into the void for a second-
HIS NIGHTMARE IS KILLING PEOPLE AND LETTING THAT CONSUME HIM?????!!?!?
AAAAAAAAAGUH MY HEART??!!???!?
Man- I love Blackhole and this episode just drove the stake into my heart. The fact that he, himself, is a being who causes death by getting too close to people made me writhe in BFB. But actively showing the extent of how it affects him—ack! He knows he causes death, which is why it's so important for him not to kill people, and why he's so strict about the pact rules!!
It makes so much sense... BFB 1 had it all laid out, and TPOT 10 sewed it together.
From the way he was hesitant about helping Flower!!! We know- he knows he's gonna end the world by getting closer, but he gives into it anyway. Instead of putting his foot down to Flower, he gives in to his feeling of wanting to be closer to people—from the way he's so happy about being shrunk—and more later. Then we get that whole thing with everyone about to die.
We know if Four never came, everyone would've died. Blackhole knows that too, from the end of his nightmare. More specific to this clip though, from the scene with Pie and LIY, since he literally just gave in to the urge to get closer and he wants that to never happen again. As a singularity in space, he could appreciate the planet, and life on it, more than other objects. He could see them all interact but never actually interact with them (besides talking), so at this chance of being beckoned, it makes sense that he'd just go "eh, fuck it, alright" then IMMEDIATELY regret his actions. Although his nightmare was about being afraid he'll "give into murderous urges", it can also be interpreted as him being afraid to let go. Something clearly stated in the last scene of his nightmare...
Queue TPOT 10 scene from clip above (I'm so mad that it's only 1 video per post on here)
Over the season we've seen him go from preventing death to just not killing people. It's morphed into his own cut-throat rule for the pact, which, in this context, is fair to see why. He joined the game via him not caring about the consequences, and it's stuck with him, so seeing everyone over and over get away with things made him HAVE to re-enforce to himself that he wasn't allowed. Death PACT doesn't kill people. HE doesn't kill people. He can't allow himself to let go of that regiment.
Obviously, this causes problems in the team- we see the clip. The thing that gets me the most is that this is bona fide trauma we're working with—Fanny telling him to #get-over-it kinda rubbed me the wrong way. And OK! I know- I know that's not exactly what she's saying but that's how it felt, and I know she has every right to be upset 'cause he was fuckin' over his team, but again that's just me! (The fact they got on the same page was enough for me anyway.) I digress, his "obsessive nature" was essentially just a response to everything that's happened to him—it's what makes him feel in control of himself. Poor BH's got trauma bad :(
I think what really twists that knife for me is that... the guy really just wants to connect with his peers normally- He wants everything to go back to normal, and that's one of the reasons he compromises with Fanny. On some level, he knows he's gone too far, but he's just afraid. Even at the end, he can't bring himself to kill Tree, even though he knows it'd be better with the new "focusing on life" angle. Did you hear that shakey exhale? Man's going through the wringer. Obviously, he won't overcome his trauma in an episode, but it's a good step to just playing and enjoying the game.
Anyway... There is probably a shitton of fans that are looking at this like "Yeah no shit Sherlock" but hey! Be nice. Some of us are slower than the others, and by some of us, I mean me. I needed this punch in the face to really see how death was impacting Blackhole's mental state and now I've word vomited my thoughts out.
#I should've done my hw instead of this but can you blame me??#I haven't gone off about him here before- but trust me. I've had thoughts on this#tpot 10 spoilers#tpot#bfb#tpot black hole#bfb black hole#character analysis#osc#long post#ehh exaggerates
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